The D Word
Some things take time. Arguably some of the greatest things that life has to offer; they take time. Rarely do the delights of life spring up over night, nor does that which remains and lasts a life time occur in a moment.
It's time we grow up. And desire that which remains. And cultivate things that last. No more microwave meals (metaphorical & physical). No more quick fix, fast answers.
I chose to withhold this post until I felt like I could speak honestly about this topic. Not because I'm perfect. But because finally I've wept, slept & lived it enough to comment on it. So let’s dive in.
Let's talk discipline. I think it's fair to say, we all desire it. No one is lusting after a messy life, void of structure, form & success, are they? However, are we willing to commit to the journey? Are we willing to commit to living disciplined? Or are we just dying for the sweet fruits it provides in our life? All the reward, none of the work… No judgement here guys, just a heap of rhetorical questions…
A psychology paper published in 1993 (Gladwell) popularised a theory of '10,000 hours'. In essence if anyone, commits to any thing ( skills / craft) for 10,000 hours, supposedly they are destined to achieve a level of expertise in that area. I LIKE the theory, I would love to proclaim success or professional status in any area except eyebrows & tea brewing. But, would I like spending 10,000 hours intentionally doing any one thing. NO! No I wouldn't!! That's 417 days guys. 417 lie ins rather than work outs. 417 days of Netflix over intentional learning / reading / growing. 417 days of laziness rather than frankly HARD WORK & discipline. I’m happy to summarise this theory for you. ‘You want to be great? Get disciplined.’
Discipline has been the theme of the last three years of my life, most prevalently so in the last few years of my studies. During this time I’ve learnt lessons that I’m prompted to share with you angels today. Some of which have come to me in sweet moments of revelation, reminders & encouragements from dear friends, but some of which have come with a great personal cost attached to them. I pray that even one might reach you and help you decipher a little further the season that you find yourself in and to help you love and commit a little more to discipline.
I've chosen three allegories to help demonstrate discipline. What discipline takes and what is produces. Bare with me my angels. I've embedded my heart in these words. I've thought, prayed, fought & most significantly lived them before I wrote them. I hope that becomes evident as you read on.
The Farmer.
The art of planting / sowing / reaping / growing.
Let me clarify. I’m not imploring all of you fabulous 21st century girls to drop your straighteners & race to the fields to yield your pitch forks or ploughs (Apols. I don’t know the farmer’s choice of tools ). Rather, I would encourage you to turn your attention to ‘The Farmer’ the figure / person we see unravelling through countless biblical narratives. The farmer signifies the discipline of waiting. Patiently. Expectantly. Waiting. Because crops don't grow over night & nor do dreams. The farmer personifies patience. The farmer knows how to wait and he / she knows how to wait well.
“ Be patient therefore brothers (and sister babes), until the coming of the Lord. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, being patient about it, until it receives the early & late rains.” James 5:7 ESV
The Farmer: Patiently waits.
In this moment let me mention that waiting isn't the same as watching. Farmers don’t watch the earth. Watching is passive. Conversely, they wait and waiting is active. We wait on the Lord, in the Lord. We wait in knowledge that our waiting bears fruit. We don’t watch the Lord, like a by stander, rather we wait on Him, in His Word, in His love. As a farmer finds himself familiar with the seasons, confident in the process, we wait in the knowledge that once we have sowed, we must wait before the harvest is seen. I believe in this way, the farmer exudes confidence. Confidence in the process and contentment in the wait. The farmer knows that trees don't burst through dry ground 24 hours from the moment a seed was sown, rather he knows the rhythms of time and season. He doesn't watch the land, hoping and willing ( come on sapling GROW!!) NO, he waits on the land, confident that the wait produces strength, beauty & something that will remain.
Discipline as taught by 'The Farmer' // Cultivate confidence in the process & contentment in the wait. Whatever you’re waiting for, whatever your ‘harvest’ looks like, perhaps a new career, a partner, insert any dream here… Trust the work of your hands, cultivate confidence in the processes that you have completed, if you have sown then you will reap. In English? If you worked hard. You’ve put the time, the sweat, the blood, the tears (all the student nurses said AMEN), then all that is left is the wait. Lay aside your fears and anxieties that everything is going to dissipate & disappear and wait patiently for the precious fruits of your labour to grow into fullness!! Be encouraged, that truly, good things take time.
The Soldier.
The art of preparing / defending / fighting / remaining
I am a nurse. According to my professional registration, I'm actually a nurse 24/7. So that means on or off shift I have a (privilege) and responsibility to what I see and how I respond. I’m actually acutely aware of it. However, everyone else doesn't know. If I stand in a busy A&E dressed in my regular clothes, no one will recognise me for the role I play. But, If I slipped a tunic or scrubs on I'd quickly be asked for assistance or information. Because my uniform says something about me. It says something about who I am, what my skill set entails and if i’m any use to you in your situation. In many ways my uniform validates me. It adds the authority I need to get on with my job. When I dress myself at work, when I place on my uniform, and glance at myself in the mirror, I’m reminded of who I am, the worth I add, the value I place on people and the role I have to play. So here goes our second teacher, The Soldier.
A solider does a lot. But I wanna cast your attention to one specific element of The Soldier… The Armour. Even in a 21st century context soldiers wear uniform / armour / bodysuit they do so with purpose, a soldiers body suit will usually be bullet resistant, it will have room for weapons, ammunition, food, water and other essential equipment required for the task they have to do. The armour a soldier wears helps them to defend, to fight and to remain. Dressing themselves in their uniform is the necessary preparation that they have to take to facilitate the former. You with me? You can’t fulfil the former without first completing the latter.
A soldiers back pack alone can weigh up to 45kg, that’s like carrying a small woman on your back all day. That’s also forgetting about the rest of their uniform. Preparation weighs. It isn’t comfortable even on a good day. (when you’re feeling tip top, fit and fresh!) And imagine on a bad day? Imagine adding another 45-60kg to your body on a day when you’re physically tired. Definitely uncomfortable, certainly unpleasant, but completely and undeniably necessary. Preparation has a weight and a cost. But it’s a necessary requirement for whatever task you find yourself faced with. A soldier doesn’t step into any conflict without their armour. Preparation is a discipline. Those that fail to prepare, prepare to fail. Y’all will have heard that old chestnut before. Probably cause it’s true.
“Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them.”
The Soldier: Knows the weight, cost & importance of preparation.
Discipline as taught by The Soldier / Learn the worth of preparation. Preparation is a discipline and needs to be done daily, for just about every endeavour. Whatever the process ‘ dress yourself’ for it. Know who you are, what you’re supposed to be doing and dress yourself accordingly. Prepare for it. Head in to your day prepared. Prepare your mind to anticipate & expect the best even in the worst of times. Prepare your heart and soul with thanksgiving, cos it’s pretty amazing how many things settle into their rightful position when we choose thankfulness. And prepare your body. Sleep, eat, exercise, rest. Prepare in discipline & prepare to win.
The Athlete.
The art of running, racing, training and enduring.
The Athlete. The very reason this blog post has taken a million years to finish up & publish. Because let’t be honest, some times it’s incredibly difficult to be honest.
When an animal finds themselves wounded for some reason it runs to cover up it’s wound. Just FYI you’re way more like a rabbit than you thought. I’m led to believe as humans that we do the exact same thing. Ever been offended? Hurt by someone’s words? Or felt disappointed by the outcome of something mattered to you? Or maybe (a bit of an ouch) have you ever realised something about yourself that you really didn’t like? Something ugly, like a crummy attitude or a predisposition to negativity or cynicism… . And then after that, the instance or the realisation, did you go lick your wounds? Hide away a little or take a quick pity party? It’s a yes from me. Because like a cute little furry mammal, we protect our wounds. Lest they get exposed and be seen as weakness and we fall prey to something again. So we try to hide our ugly or the ugly that has been done to us. We throw a quick band Aid on our wounds and then continue to limp on. A little more wounded than last time. Can I tell you a little something about any serious wound? It doesn’t heal by itself. And it certainly doesn’t heal when it’s tied up, swaddled and hidden from help. It needs attention. Now hold that thought, that wound thought.
Let me tell you about my wounds.
I struggle massively with comparison, I had this realisation about myself four years ago. I saw how ugly it was, saw how negatively it was impacted every area of my life, and so I did what every other human does, and I hid it… It was hideous. It is hideous. Like a wound, I decided I was better to protect it, cover it up and hobble on. Even worse than covering it up though, I actually indulged it. I continued to feed myself heavily filtered images of women I perceived as perfect. I persisted in staring at my neighbours ‘portion’ my friends blessing, gifting or calling and labelled myself as insufficient. I was bearing a crushing sense of inadequacy which was direct fruit of comparison. Yuk. Nasty wound.
Comparison only ever has two outcomes.
Insufficiency. You look at yourself and deem yourself in some way less than, or not good enough, based on your perception of someone else and their present situation.
Pride. This notion disgusts me. But honestly, it’s true. If you compare yourself to someone and you don’t see yourself as less than them, well then you’re actually seeing yourself as more than them. It actually turns my stomach but I think more of us do it than we realise. So, let’s call a spade a spade.
But when we weigh and measure ourselves against one another those are the only two outcomes. We’re better. Or they’re better. Both outcomes are lies actually. Neither are the truth. And lies are ill fitting weights, that purely endeavour to trip you up, slow you down or limit your potential on this earth. Ain’t nobody got time for dat.
Now this is where the Athlete emerges. The Athlete exemplifies discipline in so many ways. In the same way that the Soldier teaches us discipline in the way that they dress, (prepare) well the Athlete teaches us discipline in the way that they undress. Because the Athlete doesn’t know that they’re wearing excessive weight and attempt to race with it anyway. (Picture all of those scantily clad women at the Olympics in 800m. Sure, they have great legs, but that isn’t the purpose of their short shorts yeah…).
Anyway...I mentioned my wounds. My battle, both past and present with comparison, which unfortunately is all to familiar to so many precious individuals, perhaps you can even relate as you read this. This is where the Athlete’s take on things helped me out a heap.
If it’s ill fitting weight, strip it off.
If it hinders your performance, throw it away.
If it makes you slip, trip or stumble, then train yourself out of it.
I learned comparison. I didn’t come out of the womb looking at others with envy and myself with distaste, in the same way that if you deal with anger issues, hate to say it babe but that’s a learned habit. Slowly, but surely, that which we don’t turf out, embeds itself in our beings and makes home there. Slowly but surely, as I didn’t rid the little comparison-based lies that crept in to my thoughts, I let comparison live and take root in my life. But if there was a way in for it. Then there sure as hell or HEAVEN is a way out for it. Because quite simply, if I continue to carry, I won’t be able to run this race of life, I won’t endure & I won’t win. If you continue to wear it, carry it or drag it (‘it’ is any of our demons chikkas, not just comparison), then with a heavy heart I’m gonna say you won’t accomplish all that you were created to.
So it’s time to strip off.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” Hebrews 12:1
NLT
Strip off all that hinders us. And you’re gonna think ‘Well Holly, that’s super easy to say and super difficult to do.’ And yes, it certainly is. But this what helped me, and I pray that it will help you.
So if you have a wound and it ain’t healing cos it ain’t being seen to, then bring it out. Because sometimes that’s part of the stripping off process. You can’t take of that you’re not even willing to admit that you carry. It’s being brave enough to say that there is stuff you don’t like. And brave enough to take the steps to change it. Before I could even attempt to wrestle down this liar that is comparison, well I had to first of all acknowledge that I did it. I was one of those people that was full of envy and inadequacy, simultaneously. I had a wound, which was deep and getting deeper and I needed/need (let’s be real, I do not profess to have cracked this yet) to deal with it. Because it wasn’t dealing with itself. We have to stop hiding and protecting the parts of us we perceive to be vulnerable. The Athlete doesn’t just do leg day, every day, even though their chest is way weak. They recognise their weakness and work on it. They wanna build the whole body in strength. Not just the parts which are already strong, but the weaker parts too. The Athlete recognises that if you continue to build on your strength, and neglect your weakness, your strong doesn’t just get stronger, but in actual fact your weakness will begin to hinder your strength. If you have a wound or a weight, then call it out for what it is. Tell a close friend that you want rid of it. Then strip it off. Strip it off as many times as it finds itself back on you. And let your loved ones strip it off you too. But stripping takes energy and motivation! (and it really does!) Where is this seemingly endless energy gonna come from? Personally, I believe my strength comes from Christ, but He’s helping me by using this too…
Hate it till ya make it.
You don’t have to carry your weights or wounds forever. I’m certainly not gonna carry comparison forever. Nor do I believe that you will carry the wound you have in mind forever. I want rid of comparison, so I decided to hate it. Hate can be a super strong motive if you’re a human. Which I’m pretty certain we all are. Sometimes it can be a stronger motive than love. Obviously, I’d love to be motivated to rid myself of comparison by love, just cos I LOVE BEING FREE OF IT. But in truth, that’s not my motivation. My motivation is actually hate. I hate lies. I hate living with them, entertaining them and I hate that they slow me down. I hate that the lies I believe hinder me in helping other people effectively. And I really hate that comparison leaves me crippled with inadequacy or puffed up with pride. I hate it enough to strip it off every time I see it creeping in. I hate those comparative thoughts enough to shun them outta my mind as quick sharp as they arrived. Hate it till ya make it. And little by little, watch yourself get free of it. Watch it get stripped off you, permanently.
Discipline as taught by the Athlete // Strip off that which weighs, holds back & hinders. Call out your weaknesses, bring forth your wounds and let the healing process begin. The discipline amongst it all? Well, unfortunately stripping off and shaping up isn’t a once only affair. (Imagine that, hitting the gym once in your life and being fit for life. Yes. Lord.) The Athlete teaches us the discipline of the daily. The early starts, the late finishes. The commitment to building strength out of that which is weak, wounded and vulnerable so that they can endure the race and run the distance. Thank you Athlete.
In summary; fundamentally everyone desires to do something great, something significant, to add value or beauty or bring change. I know that I certainly do!! Discipline is integral to greatness. We don’t just discipline ourselves for the sake of it, cause it’s fun or something, we’ve sorta established that it isn’t. We desire discipline because we know that it’s pivotal to achieving any kind of greatness or success. Think WAY back to the top of this post. Those professionals that committed to 10,000 hours (and more) of their passion, well they didn’t do it because they thought they’d give it a whirl, they did it because they wanted to be great in their field. No-one successful sets out to be mediocre. “ Man, I would just love to be ranked 137th in the world, that is the title that I’m after”. No. That didn’t happen. Instead, our pros, CEO’s, world-changers from every field, well I’m led to believe that they dreamed big and disciplined even bigger. Just like I can. Just like you can.
Dream huge.
Discipline hard.
See ya later world changer.
All my love HF
XX